Questions to Help You Change Your Habits & Live a Better Life

YOU ARE YOUR HABITS

What most people don’t realize is that they are completely controlled by their habits. What you do everyday without even thinking about it is what creates the life you’re currently living. What you do when you wake up, what you subconsciously reach for in the pantry, what you listen to on your commute, how much time you spend on your phone, the people you talk to, the content you consume, the thoughts you have - all of it combined makes you exactly who you are in this moment. So if you want to be a better version of yourself you’re going to have to create better habits. Which is a LOT easier said than done.

Will it change your life if you read a self-development book once? No. But if you intentionally replace 20 minutes of social media scrolling with self-development reading or audio every day? Definitely! Will you be a healthier and happier human if you wake up a little earlier tomorrow to move your body and meditate? Not noticeably. But if you do it everyday for the next few months? 100%.

TRY THIS EXERCISE TODAY

Here’s a little exercise you can do to try to figure out exactly which areas of your life you need to focus on improving.

1. First, write down the things you currently do every day that you believe to be excellent habits and that you want to continue doing.

   
   Don’t cheat and write down things you sometimes do, or plan to do - no one else is looking at your answers and besides, lying to yourself defeats the whole purpose of self-improvement.

   These habits could be big or small - it could be as simple as flossing your teeth, not leaving your wet towel on the bathroom floor or telling your partner you love them. Write them all down and give yourself credit for the ways in which you’re already showing up for yourself every day.

    

2. Now, I want you to rate your satisfaction with your life as it currently is on a scale of 1 to 10.

    

   -1 being you’re at rock bottom, need to go to rehab, hire a therapist, psychologist, and rethink your entire existence (I really hope this is not where you’re at, and if it is this blog probably isn’t the best place for you to be. Go get some professional help, please)

   -10 being you are 100% satisfied with your life, have achieved everything you’ve ever dreamed of, and would be completely content if you died right after reading this sentence. Be honest. It’s not a competition.

Done? Ok, now respond to the next 10 questions with just a simple YES or NO answer.

If you’re going to answer YES that means that the feeling in your gut immediately after reading the question felt like a, “Fuck yeah!” (AKA zero doubt or hesitation of any kind)

If that’s not the case then you’d want to answer with a NO. Which doesn’t mean that the question doesn’t describe you at all (which could definitely be the case) but it could also just mean that you’re kind of feeling that way but not all the time, or not as often as you’d like. Because let’s be honest, if you rated your life a 10/10 and are about to answer yes to all of these questions then you wouldn’t have clicked on this blog post about how to live a better life in the first place now would you? Or maybe you’re just a big ol’ bullshitter. Either way, let’s get to it:

1. Do you wake up feeling energized and motivated? YES or NO

2. Are you feeding your body the kind of food it needs to function at its optimal capacity every day? YES or NO

3. Are you feeding your mind the type of content it needs to be inspired, come up with new creative ideas, and get motivated into action? YES or NO

4. Do you love going to sleep on Sunday night knowing Monday morning is another chance to do great things? YES or NO

5. Do you feel inspired, comfortable and safe in the space where you live? What about the space where you work? YES or NO

6. Does your partner help you, care for you, and make you smile so hard your face hurts? YES or NO

7. Are your friends your biggest cheerleaders? Can you talk to them about your ideas and aspirations without fear of being judged? (Even the silent kind of judgey-ness) YES or NO

8. Do you often give people random compliments or smile at strangers? YES or NO

9. When you feel thankful for random things throughout the day (like someone letting you in in traffic or the perfect amount of foam on your latte) do you usually say them outloud or write them down? YES or NO

10. Do you get up every morning when your alarm goes off without hitting snooze? YES or NO

THE TAKEAWAY

The sad part is not that the majority of people will answer ‘no’ to at least three or more of these questions, the sad part is that they will do absolutely nothing to change it. We’re conditioned to accept our current state of being because it’s comfortable and familiar. We’re conditioned to dream and talk and fantasize about the future but never actually take radical action in changing the course of our lives.

No one tells you to quit the job that pays well but makes you curse your existence getting out of bed every morning.

“The money is good and the experience is priceless. Just stick it out, it’ll be worth it in the long run”….Umm no thank you!

No one tells you to stop being friends with someone you’re close with who’s generally a good person but also majorly negative and toxic to your mindset.

“I know she can be pretty negative, but she’s our friend. I just don’t even listen to her anymore when she’s complaining. Just don’t let her get to you.” ….Yeah, solid plan.

No one tells you to leave the relationship you’re in where you look happy but don’t feel 100% fulfilled. You wish he’d try a little harder, complain a little less, get on board with your dreams, and challenge you to be better. But he’s a good guy and cares about you a lot. After all, you can’t have everything...

Except yes, yes you fucking can! Not only can you have it, but you deserve it. And the second you start to believe it is when you’ll find the strength to change your habits. You’ll be able to let go of those toxic friendships, leave the relationship that was just more comfortable than being alone, quit that soul-sucking job you hate, wake up early and drink a green juice, radiate positivity with your attitude and smile, and move your body every day - not because you want to look a certain way but because it makes you feel POWERFUL.

STOP AIMING FOR PERFECT & START AIMING FOR BETTER

I’ve also answered ‘no’ to several of the questions above and continue to work on bettering my habits and myself every day. I don’t honestly believe anyone should feel comfortable rating their life as a 10 out of 10 because we are constantly learning and growing and figuring out how to show up as our best selves and get where we want to go professionally, financially, romantically and personally. If you’re giving yourself a perfect score, then that kind of means you’ve given up on ever achieving more or being better than you are in this present moment. And that’s just sad.

WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE?

Your challenge from me today is this:

1. Address what habits in your life need changing, write them down and leave any guilt or judgment attached to them on the page. Any negativity surrounding this habit is now freed from your mind and trapped in your notebook. Leave it there.

2. Decide on an improvement you can make to this habit (or just create an entirely new one to replace it with). Go through and compile a list of new habits to replace all the shitty ones you wrote down earlier.

3. This step is the hardest: Convince yourself that these little actions matter enough to stick with them, that over time they’re powerful enough to transform your life and help you become the version of yourself you really want to be.

    

This is important to note: Nobody’s perfect, so when you fail a hundred times don’t forget to congratulate yourself on the 5 times that you actually did what you said you were going to. We get way too fixated on what we’re doing wrong and don’t give nearly enough attention to what we’re doing right. Love yourself enough to give yourself some credit.

It’s not about reaching a stage in your life where you consider everything to finally be perfect; it’s about accepting where you are, looking at how you can improve, and enjoying that journey. Celebrating even the smallest wins. Did you wake up without a snooze today? Get it girl! Did you smash it in the gym? Hell yeah you did. Did you read 10 pages of an inspiring book instead of melting your brain on Instagram? Good for you. Did you look at yourself in the mirror and choose to see something beautiful instead of some stupid irrelevant flaw? YAASSS queen.

Change your habits, change your life. You got this, sis. Let’s go #makeshifthappen